So I turned a year older on January 17th!!! It was a birthday of mixed feelings. I broke up with someone dear to me a day before my birthday, asshole move I know but my spirit did not sit well with it and I really prayed this year that the spirit guide my ways. If you read this, I am sorry. I do have a lot of weird things happen to me the week of my birthday. Its like 10th to 17th January is cursed for me. Last year, I broke up on the 12th of January, then there was that year that I got into a relationship on my birthday with this very interesting Jamaican (first loves and whatnot). I feel gratitude in general. I have been blessed, I have loved, I have fought, I have cried, I have been depressed, I have been high, I have been low, I have been lost, confused, beaten, broken but I am still here standing. So yeah, whatever you’re going through, stick in there champ. You will survive or die trying and that is true honor.
So I realize that I have been making a mountain out of a mole hill about writing on this blog. I have a list of blog topics and brief 3 to 4 sentence summary of what the post is supposed to be about. If I was a rapper or musician, those would be the lost tapes or studio sessions but i aint and that might not be an apt metaphor. Bleh, I m rusty.
So I recently went on a visit to my favorite country on earth (Sorry Nigeria, I m tired of you but alas my passport is green) for a friend’s wedding and my 10 year college reunion (Yes I m that ancient now). I spent a month (with a brief 1 week detour to London) and visited New York, Miami, Los Angeles and Denver. Those who know me know that I moved back to Nigeria immediately after college and hence I have been here for a decade with the occasional visit to the states. Why did I come back? It would be a subject of another post if I ever write it.
Pieces and Pieces, It keeps shattering
They say the abyss is the lowest point
What if there is a lower level?
Better still what if you keep falling for eternity
Unearthing new lows to your existence
What if there is no karma?
What if all the good you put in the universe does not mean shit?
What if all your good intentions will come to naught?
Would you long to leave this flesh suit and mortal inhabitance?
What if friends abandon you, lovers discard you like trash?
What if you were tempted to say a big fuck you to the almighty?
What if despite your travails you are so blessed?
What if you cant cry because you know others have it worse?
Are we in a who can cry the loudest portion of the space-time continuum?
What if you just give up?
No not suicide, you just dont want to care anymore.
What if you are tired of the pain, of the struggle and the dynamics of love?
What if because you are a man you are blackmailed into always appearing strong?
What if in reality you are as sensitive as they come?
What if your heart is already and forever will be in pieces?
Pieces and Pieces, shattered is my past, present and future.
However you spin it, the frontrunner in next year’s election is Incumbent President, Muhammadu Buhari. By virtue of his solid 10-14 million king of the north base who have voted for him in every election he has contested since 2003, by virtue of his still solid alliance with Tinubu and the South West, by virtue of his staunch hailing hailers who can see no wrong in this man and by virtue of federal might, rigging and the power of incumbency. Quick fact check, the regions with the highest PVC (permanent voter’s card) collection are North West with 14.6million and South West with 9.3 million as of August 2018. This fact is important because even if one wants to rig, the key limitation to the equation is the number of registered voters and/or number of PVC collected. So here is the conspiracy plan, with huge registration in areas loyal to Buhari and Tinubu rigging will make it mathematically impossible for opposition to win if registered voters in regions they control are not as much as those controlled by the APC. There is also a rumor that a lot of Nigerien/Chadian and Cameroonians living in Nigeria will be given amnesty to help make up the numbers up north. Stay tuned for the drama…
First of all, I love Nigeria and being Nigerian to bits. *Insert super patriotic music here*. However, I will confess that having our passport kind of sucks to be honest. I need a visa to go basically everywhere including if I want to take a shit in my backyard (shoutout to the countries that let us in visa free or with visa on arrival, you’re the real heroes for doing this in spite of my shady countrymen). Visa wait times can be disastrous at times (side eye to Canada and Australia who have kept some Nigerian passports for 6 months to a year before issuing a visa, like for real there needs to be a clause where these countries and embassies pay people for inconvenience. As a Nigerian looking to explore the world you have to be efficient in your planning, I m talking on some Sherlock Holmes, project management, planning engineer type stuff. You should think of where you want to go like 3 months ahead and look up requirements and stuff. You have to look at the exchange rate to our piss poor currency (dear naira, do better!), look at the racism factor there; I did learn that being an African in Mainland Europe (side eye Spain!) means people assume you came off a boat, whereas black american (love my distant cousins) they think you are cool. Long ass Intro paragraph huh? keep reading.
What is a Horcrux? Horcrux, plural Horcruxes in Harry Potter folklore is a piece of one’s soul that gets created when performs a supreme act of evil. This part of the soul is separated from the main soul and serves as a form of insurance against death. Basically you have to destroy all to truly destroy the owner of the horcruxes. The main villain in the Harry Potter story uses this as a way to ensure his immortality.