2012: The Year the world didn’t end, 2013: Your Year of…*Insert Pentecostal babble here*
Ladies, Gentlemen and other not so cultured people of the reading public, it’s your favorite or not so favorite fair weather blogger and friendly neighborhood pseudo-writer (Let me indulge myself), Alhaji Saint Sir Farouk the First of Gwara-gwara land and Prince of Zamunda. I know that this time of the year is one of somber reflection and a time to make resolutions and whatnot. I personally prefer to do my Alingo, Azonto and Komole as I gather my thoughts.
If you are reading this, you survived the end of the world or at least the end of the world according to the Mayans.
So Yay you, bring out a bottle of cheap beer or ale and pop in celebration. Clap for yourself, do the hokey pokey and shake your bum bum (cue aptly named Timaya track). 2012 is over. We are now in 2013. I am sure by now you have been inundated with text messages, bbm broadcast, twitter and whatsapp messages as well as phone calls from friends, family, acquaintances and people you barely know. Did I mention also from sketchy hookups of 2012? Yeah, them too. They have no doubt chosen to compose an elaborate Happy New Year’s message in the typical Nigerian fashion that goes like “Happy New Year blah blah, God will grant you blah blah in 2013, joy (I prefer irish spring soap), peace (not piss you big freak!) and blah blah shall never depart from you. 2013 will be your year of *insert appropriate Pentecostal babble here*…” or something of the sort.
That being said and on a quite serious note (think sitting on the toilet trying to squeeze out some constipated waste type of serious), I am thankful for being able to successfully see through the year 2012. 2012 was a good year in many respects. It was the year I got a job. Your boy is no longer a bum. Can I get an Amen or a High five? Both equally symbolic. It was a year I had a stable and peaceful relationship, at least up until May when Le break happened. It was the year I moved back to my beloved Nigeria for what seems to be for good (National anthem plays in the background). It was a year a made quite a number of friends on the internet, in the blogging world, twitter and online dating (yea I have been on some of those sites). It was also the year I had a few pseudo-relationships online and flirtations with people I am yet to meet especially on twitter. It was a year I reconnected with my ex from the longest relationship I have ever had and realized that I still have a thing for every girl I have ever dated but especially this one. In some universe, it would have worked (Drake mode).
It was a year where I got a little bit of more leeway from my parents (still get treated like a kid though but its improving). It was a year that I was somewhat quite religious in the summer then fell off subsequently (Jesus take the wheel!). 2012 was the year where I did the most exercise (picture me jogging and going to the gym) and actually kind of became a fitness freak. In 2012, Konji was at an all-time low and might have been my best year in that department since college. (TMI? Man-whore? Hug transformer). Lastly, In 2012 I survived about 2 situations (that I can remember) that could have led to death (Do I hear you say I have 7 lives left, here’s to not dying in 2013), well for that I thank the big man above, baba God noni.
As for my plans for 2013, I plan to stop procrastinating like a mofo. In 2013 I hope to be a man of action. I need to stop overthinking life and just do things. In 2013, I will work to see my ideas become reality. In 2013, I will be a better friend and keep in touch with people especially family. I plan to workout more in 2013, operation 007 body is in full effect. I plan to moderate my drinking more and my diet. In 2013, I will be a better lover. I will also work to stop being so awkward all the damn time, stop being passive aggressive and learn to say when I’m grieved instead of keeping it all bottled up. In 2013, I hope to have a better relationship with and understanding of God. I will work harder at life and stop trying to coast on whatever innate knowledge I have. I will grow my wealth in 2013. I will mature as a person. 2013 is the year I start a more serious search for the one, I will find my Queen to be in 2013. , Did I mention I will continue to write!
So that’s it from me folks. Happy New Year!!! I love you all. I wish you only the best in the coming year. So I shared the highlights of my 2012 and what I hope to achieve in 2013. I would love for the bold ones amongst us to share what their 2012 was like and what they hope to achieve in the coming year.
A dap for the guys and a hug for the ladies (frontal please!) from me. See you in the comments!